Live from the Woods it’s Saturday Night!

Good evening, I'm Chevy Chase and you're not..






Have you ever been in the woods on a Saturday night and said to yourself, “what the hell am I doing here? I could be on the beach right now.” Well if you never have? you might be a squatcher. And if you are and you have service right now, you're probably reading this from the woods right now.





Everybody has their own idea of a good time. And I love beach time and live in my bathing suit in the summer. But if you really wanted to know what a nice Saturday night would be for me? I’ll describe it as follows. A nice roaring fire, bottle of wine. (Just Boonfarms will do for me.) 😉great stories, great friends and if your lucky someone special who enjoys the need to be outdoors and wild. Squatching and chilling.





But it wouldn’t be Saturday Night Live in the woods without some funny mishaps, and out in nature you just can't anticipate everything  because live is live after all. Tonight I thought I'd share a few of mine.











John Belushi in his bumble bee suit has nothing on a certain June bug in Maine. This bug flew out of my wood pile directly into my eye while getting the fire ready. Swollen and blind in the Maine darkness was an interesting situation. Thank god I know what happens to me and packed Benaydril (and the rest of the drug store too).











Candygram, Landshark. Everyone knows that shark. But did you know there is also another elusive shark? It's called the Loonshark. While swimming in Moose pond also in Maine. (Maybe I should not come back here after tonight huh?) I felt something repeatedly brushing against me. I kept pushing it away, and it kept coming back. I was so annoyed I started to come up for air and to kick that branches ass, but it was not a branch it was the leg of a Loon. A loon! Oh, they are very rare to see they say, don't like people they say. We broke the surface at the same time and we were face to face. I know most of you have heard of a Loon call but I assure you it’s louder and scarier face to face. And who knew their lips flapped!?! I nearly drowned and no one stopped laughing long enough to save me!






SNL- "A bear ate my parents!"




A Bear ate my Parents skit with Horatio Sanz was one of my favorites. But having a bear chase you in real life? That is something else entirely. When I was 18. ( which was like two years ago) I was in North Conway in the White Mountains area of New Hampshire. My best friend and I decided to give camping without parents a try. We had a lovely fire going, great food and a case of passion flavored wine coolers. We finished said case and hit the tent. Without realizing, my friend put the food cooler in the tent with us. She hikes all over Arizona now but she was city girl then. In the middle of my passion fruit induced slumber.  I hear snuffling and banging. I look up and see the reflection of a bear twice the height of me on two legs. First,  I had the omg he is a real moment. Then realized it was a bear. A quick look around showed me the food cooler and just BAM! I knew this could be bad. In a quick moment, we pushed cooler to the front of the tent, cut a hole out the back and ran for our lives.





And as funny as all these moments are to me now, they were truly scary then. They were real and they were dangerous. Luckily I learned a lot with every disaster. But even if I didn't the adrenalin of the search, the hope of seeing him one day. The great memories, fresh air, and freedom always overcame what fear I had. Most of you are out there every weekend too but you are brave enough to film it or stream it live. No second takes there. So kudos to you and I thank you for both because I love watching. (some more than once) So Enjoy your Saturday Night in the woods live tonight everyone. Create some funny memories and great research to share with me and each other. Be safe, free and wild, always.





”Goodnight and have a pleasant tomorrow.”





No animals were harmed writing this blog. But if I ever see that loon again, it's game on!





Tonight’s post is dedicated to a funny lady who loved SNL and Bigfoot and is primarily responsible for my twisted mind. Mom, one year ago today at 5 am you took your last breath with me and I miss you more every day. Love you. Dad, I didn't forget about you on February 5th. I cranked Dino for you and made a delicious porketta. Wish you were there to share it. But then again, I wouldn't have had yummy leftovers.

Great BF survival site:

Steelandflint.com

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

He Does Exist..The Semi-Autobiographical Tale of Dyatlov Pass

Image
On yet another glorious snowy morning in Massachusetts, the 3rd one in as many weeks, I sat out in the doorway just watching it all come down. I couldn't help but think-what if I was outside lost and stranded? What if the abominable snowman exists and is out hunting right now?  It made me think of a tale, a true tale, of an abominable snowman that was out prowling, that did hunt people. He currently resides in the icy slopes of Dyatlov Pass, in the Ural Mountains of Russia. I feel relatively safe telling his tale from this location. It would be a lot of work for him to get here. But just in case, I have a Louisville Slugger near my door. His tale is the most frightening one I've ever heard and has haunted me since I first heard of it many years ago. (Many? Did my editor put that word in)?It's a scary tale because it is real...and we have proof. On February 2nd, 1959. Nine unsuspecting college students entered the liar of a Yeti and didn't survive to tell this tal
Read more

A Moment with a Monster 

Image
An MC Monster,  that is. On this monster of a Monday  I had a chance to ask the artist himself a few questions about his amazing characters, how he creates them and how you all can get an original from him. And I’m sure after you see them, you will be a follower of his art. And spoiler alert, he may, may,  be coming to a city near you soon.. An interview with an artist: Q: Can you tell me a little bit about the characters you create? “The monsters I create aren’t evil entities, but more of like watchful protectors, leaders or guides through the spiritual realm.”  My favorite piece, I picture it as a moment between the big guy and myself.. Q: When did you begin creating them? “I started playing around with this style in June 2017, after my little sister passed away.” Q: What process do you use to create these wonderful characters? “The process is more often then not just winging it. I lay down a background, and then sort of just go for it. When I’m doing commission pieces I fo
Read more

Booger Funnels...

Image
This post is from a guest blogger, Sunday Monroe from Team Cryptid Mississippi. I have not changed any text from the piece beyond basic editing, which you all know I’m terrible at...Thank you to Sunday for sharing and emailing me this... Boogers are always in transition. They move about from place to place as needs dictate. They must, no moss grows on them for sure. It is what they have to do, it’s how they survive. This practice probably has more than a little to do with why they remain generally undocumented. You cannot define what you can’t pin down and examine. This is a trait that you can take advantage of if you want to go and see one for yourself, by thinking like a Booger thinks. If I was a Booger, why would I leave the relative comfort of my den? Because I’m hungry, of course. It takes a lot of food to support a single, large primate much less an entire family of them.  Few places offer food in sufficient amounts year round to support a family of Boogers. In most location
Read more